A New Pope

Três anos atrás, mal JP 2 embarcou para sua derradeira viagem e o conchavo fez a fumaça subir, já ficou claro qual seria o principal tema de paródias com o sucessor. Pra começar, a enorme semelhança entre o recém-eleito Raztinger e o imperador Palpatine. O resultado? Darth Bento:

Mas o melhor fica por conta do vídeo – já um pouco velho mas só descobri recentemente – que mostra Bento XVI em uma cerimônia Jedi-Apostólico-Romana, no papel de Jessel, The Tryphelge Gutenard.

O vídeo é ótimo, os drones de Digitox, o discurso de Lord Ipsulot e a cena final, em que Jessel ostenta seu Cálice de Luz.

Link do Vídeo

Como não há legendas, segue uma transcrição aproximada, encontrada neste endereço.

Now begins the 6th of the 28 stages of Meta generation, for Jessel, the Tri-phelge Gutenard. Ruler of Cozark and the Outer Lands, destroyer of the Nonespeare, and Architect of the treaty of Ghwatek Usne. Ammiseries of the quad kingdoms have traveled many Klagz to witness the ceremony. The Bejar, there. Woo-Botox of Jeerand 7. The still living brain of the mighty Kipl, today being carried by the Simbiot Vunt in his Jewel Encrusted Ceremonial Stasis Orb. And here is Jessel, receiving a long line of Drones from Digitox, the Removeable Hard Drive planet. As they approach him one by one, he inputs new data, and sends them upon their way. 2 of the elders of Digitox there, processing, and archiving good wishes for the Tri-phelge Gutenard with tremendous speed and effeciency. And now, it is the turn of Lord Ipsulot of Boak to plead in his own tounge, the mercy of Jessel. The crowds seem to like the speech, but what will Jessel think? Jessel (the pope) raises a 9 The speech pleases him. Lord Ipsulot will be spared and the worlds of Boak will not be smashed this yan. The people of Zantiar are jubilent, but over in a cold part of the square, is the enclosure of the dark ones, former nemesis of Jessel, they stand defiant in their black uniforms. They know their time will come again, and not even the Tri-phelge Glutenard can stop them, or can he?